2022
2022-02-17 – Shotgun
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Breaking news as in I broke into the news room again which means it’s time for Batty News
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Today’s top story Farmer Mcgregor wrote my wrong name on his retraining order. we go live to mister mcgegor’s farm for comment and by comment I mean I’m stealing one of his apples and running while he shoots at me with his shotgun. Truly it is a thursday
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Does this count as one we will have to check with the officals!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now for traffic.. well I am currently looking for a get away vehicle, but I can’t find any. Now for sports
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Anyway that is all from batty news for today, tune in next week after I heal from these buck shot wounds!!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): As for weather I should have picked a foggy day!
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Shouldn’t that be batshot wounds?
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): They don’t make bat shot for shot guns ^^
2022-02-18 – Magnets
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): It appears that that people, in charge of communications, are using new magnetic lock doors on the communations room.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Nothing a blow torch can’t fix so while I break in, It’s time for some Batty News ^^
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Today’s top story; Magnets how do they work?!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): *answer
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): well we would talk to our top pony scientists, but they are currently getting Lobotomies what ever those are ^^ So the snawer is magic they are magic
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Darn the blow torch isn’t working so we’ll move on to sports as in cna I have a bunch of foot ball players try to bust down this door? That would be great!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): As for weather; We will find out weather or not this door is still standing later today ^^
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Fine fine no foot ball players… OH traffic!! *steals the door and puts it in the middle of a road way* there might be some slight delays
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): That’s it for Batty News for now, tune in tomorrow
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Maybe, that’s if I finally defeat this door
Sonny Redrose gives it an apple
Batty Bat happily eats from sonny’s hand
2022-02-19 – Monkeys & Demons
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): HELLO PONYWORLD!!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): It’s time for Batty News. Today’s top story the door is gone!!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Hank? Hank’s a liar
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Which also leads me to traffic; a bunch of monkeys were seen worshipping the door I placed int he middle of the road. So route nine will be blocked while they worship their new metal god
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now for sports; the teams are getting ready for the big event on sunday sunday sunday
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Come see the ponies kick balls into nets and.. kick more balls in to nets
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now for weather, the sun is still shinning and we have no idea how to stop it!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): We asked ponies to try to summon the rain sprits by running str. inbstead we summoned five demons and some guy named phil
Safra Nitely: APPLES will be give to ponies who can provice information about this orange winged crature that steals carts in the middle of the night and moves them about
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I thought my wings were brown
2022-03-03 – Batty Bandit
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I just relaized something… I didn’t steal a cart today!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now I’m sad
ruff (Rufftuff): try apples ?
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I have plenty of apples
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): This jut in; The Batty Bandit struck again this time she stole a TT cart declared base and TPed home! her current whereabouts are unknown unless you are at RJH
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): In the basement of the cabin
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Co-ordinates are Rose Jewel Haven, Coral Winds (110, 96, 22)
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Ask for batty winky smiley face
2022-03-17 – Pillows and Glasses
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Hi everyone!!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I have a question
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): We have a pony in training at RJH and they are in the training boots, is there a pillow that I can strap to them so they wouldn’t hurt themselves when they land?
Diablo (Harold Tryce): Yes, bats dont like apples
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): and if so how much would said pillow cost?
Batty Bat nibbles an apple
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): also, Hi everyone ^^
Rath (RathMexxa): Plenty of free mod pillows on the MP just a question off finding the right attachment point.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): nods
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I’m back with new glasses ^^
Poseidon (WorkerPony): I thought Bats used their voice ?
Normuser: New prescription or new frame?
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Both Norm ^^
Normuser: yay
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Everyone knows bats have poor eyesight
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Glad they sorted you with new glasses, batty
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): and that’s usually at night Poseidon, Most bats… myself excluded have very good eyesight
Derry Bree (DerryBree): Then way the glasses?
Normuser checks out “The vision of bats is tuned to low-light conditions such as is present during dawn and dusk. While some bats may not have as good color vision as humans, their overall vision may be better than humans during dawn and dusk. Bats have both excellent hearing and good eyesight.” https://www.wtamu.edu/~cbaird/sq/mobile/2013/04/09/why-are-bats-blind/
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Except for me, I have very poor eyesight hence the glasses ^^
Derry Bree (DerryBree): flop, flopping
Batty Bat eeps and hugs Miss Derry ^^
2022-03-25 – Relaxed News
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Also, it’s now time for a more relaxed Batty News
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): sips tea today’s top headline which is better classical or meditation music?
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): We asked our ponies this exact question, but we forgot their ears are plugged. so relaxing
2022-03-27 – Writers Block
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): OH NO IT’S TIME FOR BATTY NEWS ^^
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Hello pony land and it’s time for today’s top story.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Which is: writers block.. Is it the worst thing ever.. We asked out top artistic pony’s this question and they threw paint at me and yelled ‘I CAN’T WORK UNDER THESE CONDTIONS’ then stormed off in a huff
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): So the answer is: Maybe?
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now lets go to our eye ins the sky for traffic…. and we just got word our eye in the sky has been shot down, that said; is there a vet near by? Back to me for sports!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): The pony Pro am cup is today
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): So make sure you cheer on your favorite team. Mine is the Ref. ^^
Surssin Dragonian (Surssin): Uhm… Batty? That was yesterday I’m afraid.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): I thought today was Sunday
Surssin Dragonian (Surssin): It is. It was held at TT on Saturday.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): OH
Surssin Dragonian (Surssin): Unless there’s another one I don’t know about.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Well then… No sports today ^^ Everyone can relax. hides the poster of the ref she posted on her wall
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now it’s time for stocks lets go to the market!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): sorry it’s taking a bit to load
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): OOO this looks nice but it’s kind of expensive ^^ https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/Tabernacle-Stocks-Nightfall-v1/8114278
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): And that’s it for stocks today as well as Batty news ^^
Surssin Dragonian pets the bat bat.
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Tune in tomorrow when we finally find out why all the top ponies are getting lobotmize ^^
Batty Bat leans into the pettings
2022-03-31 – Look Over There
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): LOOK OVER THERE!!
TotallyScen: WHERE
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): IT’S BATTY NEWS!!
Scenara Crowe le gasps
2022-04-01 – Falling Pirate Ship
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Look in the sky! It’s a bird, it’s a plane, noooo it’s Batty News^^
RenamonThePirateFox: and its a falling pirate ship!?!?!
TotallyScen: So its a flying pony then ?
OutLooking: giggles
Blue (Bluebury Fall): Must be the late edition..
RenamonThePirateFox: nope its just a hurricane that lifted a schooner up…. watch out bellooowwwwww
Scenara Crowe (TotallyScen): Ohno D:
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Yeah batty had to do RL things today
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): sorry about that ^^
2022-04-05 – Deer Season
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): LOOK OVER THERE! IT’S BATTY NEWS!!
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Today’s top story it’s deer season, by that I mean it’s pet a deer season, so don’t forget your brushes, your antler polish, and maybe a leash if your deer is kinky and be sure to make sure your bucks and does are looking their best this season
Batty Bat (Toren Epin): Now for sports!!
2022-04-20 – Happy Birthday
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This just in – BASE!!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also it’s time for Batty News. Today’s top story; batty gets away with three stolen ponizei
WyvernMommy: breaking news … breaking news … breaking news
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also It’s batty’s brithday ^^
Marcel Luv: YAAAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU LITTLE CART STEALING BATTY!!!!
Hotie Lane: Happy Birthday that means you get a cage as a present.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): OOO is it a small cage?
Wyvern Mommy (WyvernMommy): Batty’s carts broke Bulgogi sim
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): It did? I admit I tried to drive my new bat cart cross the sim and it had a script failure
2022-04-21 – Meeting
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): LOOK UP IN THE SKY! IT’S A BIRD! IT’S A PLANE! sigh never mind it’s just Batty News…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and today’s top story is; someone locked the studio door and I can’t get in!
Thelvyn: Today’s secondary news, Batty is once again skipping out of the FFF meeting. Tisk tisk
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): There’s a meeting today?
Thelvyn: It’s the third Thursday of the month. ^.^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): OHn My way to the meeting!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Batty News will have to wait a bit
2022-05-26 – Just In
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Just in It’s time for batty news!
2022-05-26 – Pyro Kevin’s Used Fire Works and Sawdust Factory
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Breaking news! I found the key I hid in my apple barrel to the communications room!
Surssin: Well, at least the door is intact
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): yeah about that….
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): after I unlocked the door I used C4 on it
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): so it was the wrong key?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Nope it worked
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): ……..
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news today the void has returned the roads after taking them earlier today
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also all glory to the mystic void
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news there was polo practice today
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): there was also hooligan practice but it got called off because of good behavior
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6Al_DShXX0
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): Wait, you have sponsors now?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yep batty got sponsors
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): wow. nice
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): such as Pyro Kevin’s used fire works and sawdust factory, Medicore Franks Mares, Fillys and stallions, Crazy Steve’s used flooring emporium, Old Man Mcree’s Carts and Apples
RubberJamie: Someone actually funds dis??
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): usually it’s Pyro Kevin’s used fire works and sawdust factory
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): but sadly that blew up last week
Vivian Winters (RubberJamie): insurance scam
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): how dare you say such a thing about Pyro Kevin
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Maybe one of the fireworks wasn’t as ‘used’ as it should have been
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): Would explain how Batty pays for things
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I dance for my lindens ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And now for everyone’s favorite part of the Broad cast it’s time for Stocks and Bondage!!!
Vivian Winters starts flinging Lindens at Batty :P
Squeak Toy dances while giving the news
Pony Sorrowsong: Oh how much is a share?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Well right now the price of bats is still up as ranches prepare for Halloween
Lixi (Pony Sorrowsong): Sell for a stock i mean…the stock price..not bats!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): However the price for ghost ponies is even higher
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): XD not those types of stocks Lixi these are the stocks you lock people in ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): hence stocks and bondage ^^
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): So the price is two pad locks. :P
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): XD
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yes
Lixi (Pony Sorrowsong): noo..we were not talking about ghosts, or bats…about stocks and bondages…yes, i know…you like in the price of a bodn for a certain time, and get interest…and so that sounds stocks and bondage sounds very interesting …like a good investiment.
Lixi (Pony Sorrowsong): lock in the price and time
raveenaRS pays one Linden for the bat
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Mistress jazzy you already own me!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and you know my price was two pieces of pocket lint and a bent paper clip
2022-10-15 – Late Night Drink Driving
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with late night break in news. Today’s top story; it’s late and I should be in bed!
AllyssaAdams: you should
Shiloh (AllyssaAdams): spanks da butt spank spank spank
BigMcIntoshSL: indeed^^
Fluff Palmer prepares sleeping brick
Squeak Toy squeaks wildly and wags her tail
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Hi Fluff and shiloh
Shiloh (AllyssaAdams): hi hi
Fluff Palmer (FluffMP): Hi batty
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Hi Mc ^^
McIntosh (BigMcIntoshSL): Hello Squeak^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news, polo tomorrow so be sure your polo gear is nice and shiny! and if you are a hooligan be sure to have your riot gear ready for if your team loses or wins tomorrow’s game, game.. Oh lets face it no matter what happens you’re going to riot you crazed fans you.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news Route 9 is clear this evening theres’ not a single cart on the road
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): So if you want to do some late night carting this is the perfect time
Barley Sugar considers drink driving
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No bad barley no driving for you
Barley Sugar hiccups
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Lets get you locked in a stall for a bit
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Can we have an FFF trainer hold onto Barley’s reins?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Speaking of reins that brings us today’s sponsor
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Reins and Things, They have reins and things.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): They have a sale today, buy one set of tack get the Necromonicon for free
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news it’s a little chilly tonight so be sure to wrap yourself in a nice warm blanket as you stare up at the sky and wonder if there is other life out there… then be amazed when you are abducted by aliens
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In stocks and bondage news; bats, spiders, snakes, and witches are in high demand as Halloween is inching closer.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No I did not ^^
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): She laid awake all night pondering if there was a dog
Cotton Candy (Tailmon1): I am certain that a caldron of bat soup will be in the making …
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Oh Barley of course there is a dog, it keeps scratching at my door, And as soon as I let it in it want’s back out again
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Cotton no that s how the thing that shall not be named happened . instead of bats, you should use beef or chicken ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Anyway that is all for batty news tonight tune in next time as we find out if this box connected to a string is a trap, my guess is no since it has an apple under it
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Till then stay batty everyone ^^
2022-10-16 – Bat Hunt
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This just in From the BNN news room, batty has over slept!
GemmaEquine: Shocking
Christine (Christinedutch): that’s news
Surssin: Yikes! More coffee!
RubberJamie: evil coffee!!
Sonny Redrose: mmmm hmmmmm my kind of evil..
primerib1: intravenous coffee!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In today’s news RJH had their second weekly bat hunt day. Batty was caught and is currently being a servant to Miss Bonehart
GemmaEquine: Miss Bone hard?
GemmaEquine: oh sorry I read that wrong
Sonny Redrose: and i SO resisted saying that !
Squeak Toy chitters
2022-12-11 – Ice Apples
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): More Break In news batty has broken out of Jail is on her way to work
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): But first she has to see Santa
theGPBunny Resident: Its fun
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top news story; Our top pony scientists have invented Ice apples , these apples will grow all year round. thus supplying more of the pony armies for the gradual take over ^^
2022-12-30 – Hermaphroditic
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN break in news!!
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): BNN?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Batty news Network ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Today’s top story I kinda forgot to pay rent on the cave so. All of us bats are staying in the news room till I can make rent
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): What did you use the rent money on?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I bought stock in apple.. I thought I was buying fruit T.T
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I love apples but I can’t eat the apples I got.. they have big monitors
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): for the wreid machines that I got instead of apples.. I don’t know if anyone would want them
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Anywho in traffic news the pony caravan had it’s end of the year voyage, we don’t know where they were going but we do hope all ponies had fun ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And I guess the drivers could have fun too..
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news The losers took on the winners in a all out street brawl with the winners losing and the losers winning.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form out sponsor, Medicare hank’s Fillys Mares and Stallions! Now located in (redacted) Come in for their sunday special where you can were if you buy two mares you get a stallion free
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Would a hermaphroditic pony count as a mare or a stallion asking for a friend.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news the snu seems to be melting in some areas so trainers are advised to record their ponies slipping and sliding around.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And fianlly in stocks and bondage news; The Pony queen pricness sprakle bottom the second has broken loose! so if you see an elf wearing holiday tack with a candy cane in their butt be sure to grab their reigns
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): That is all for batty news today tune in tomorrow when we ask the important question.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): why is a raven like a writing desk!
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): I don’t know, Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I don’t knwo either that is why I ask asking ^^
2023
2023-03-06 – Banana Spill
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This just in form the BNN news room *clears throat* Base!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top news story I have asked top ponies an important question and we have all come to an agreement, it is not fact Saturday night and nor are we live in New York
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news the after polo riot was put down after the various pony police departments caught wind. so the score is Riots 0 – PP 1
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Better luck next time
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news to day route 50 was closed after a banana spill so sadly we have no bananas.. we have no bananas today
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our new sponsor Stair Roids! Now with more Vitamin Q!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news; it’s going to be a dark and stormy night so watch out for monsters and people holding flashlights to their faces
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In stocks and bondage news today; Fae folk red heads and the members of unseely court are on high demand as ponies, as saint Patrick’s day is just around thee corner. There is also a demand for kelpies but word advice I wouldn’t ride one ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And that is all for batty news today tune in tomorrow when we ask, How much is that doggy in the window. The answer will shock and horrify you… Till then stay batty everyone ^^
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): St Georges day isn’t far off either
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yeah but what has he ever done besides form the British Empire slay a dragon. Big woop what he should have done was spare the dragon and use it as a mount
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Dragon mounts are awesome
Poseidon (WorkerPony): As Poseidon (and a redhead, the kelpies sound a lot like my stable of hippocampuses and the kraken. Hope they don’t bother you too much
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): RELEASE THE KRAKEN!
Poseidon (WorkerPony): Yes !!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This just made my day even better
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): also I meant no offense to anyone from britan but saint george would have been more awesome if he rode the dragon into battle insteaqd of killing it just saying
Cassaina: Im pretty sure “riding the dragon” is illegal
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Not that kind of dragon
Cassaina: Oh man, speaking of Britian did you know that their own national security didn’t even know that there is a dragon in the tower of london?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): It depends on the dragon’s size
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I mean a small dragon could hide anywhere there
Cassaina: Its a huge fricken dragon at the top of the tower of london
Poseidon (WorkerPony): Well USA has Area 51. But it seems like keeping a dragon in the middle of such a large city could be risky.
Cassaina: It takes up the entirity of the top of the tower
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Well that’s just silly
Cassaina: Its reall I tell ya im not crazy
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Finally in stocks and bondage we got a wanted add! Wanted a group of ponies or stallions to pull a coach, they must be easy to work with and silly, they also must not be scared of headless folk. if interested contact Don the Dullahan
Surssin: Headless?!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and that is all the pony news for today! tune in tomorrow when we ask How much longer can I keep making this stuff up. till then stay batty everyone!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): well the coachman is a dullahan Sur, being headless is part of ther job
2023-04-05 – Ransom Ranches
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with a break in news report; This just in major pony ranches all over SL are dissappearing. And Yes we have stolen those pony ranches and we will not return them until we get an apple
Barley Sugar coyly offers an apple to the bat, “Please return the Frilly Filly Farm unharmed, Batty”
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Okay miss Barely, you can have FFF back, after I make sure it’s nice and clean ^^
Barley Sugar whinnies excitedly
Fluff Riverfox (FluffMP): I will check it Batty
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yes Miss Fluff ^^
Fluff Riverfox (FluffMP): Or someone will be stuck in a maid tack for the next week or two, to learn how to clean properly
Squeak Toy eeps
Wyland Greene: Bad Batty has a nice maid outfit, btw
Squeak Toy blushes brightly
Fluff Riverfox (FluffMP): Good
Fluff Riverfox (FluffMP): KaS maid dress looking good on her
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news the big game is this weekend so all you holigans make sure you have your proper gear for the after match riot ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Mow a word form our sponsor “Hanks Tanks”, if your pony army won’t fall into rank, then you need a tank from hank. That’s Hank’s Tanks off route 150
2023-05-19 – Laser Eyes
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): The door is locked so I’m testing to see if I have eye lasers
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): You mean you don’t have a sonic screwdriver, like Dr Who?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Nope ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Besides he’s a Time Lord and I’m a robot
Eve Mannonen: Think the door is wood too ;p
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Wood door s robot’s greatest weakness
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): also I don’t have eye lasers T.T
2023-06-07 – Robot Plague
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news! I got caught tryng to break into the news room
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Uh Oh, why were you breaking in?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): The new room
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Well the PIG communications tower
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Not the old one ?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): nope the old news room kind of burnt down after I tried to plug myself into an outlet…
Keith Rowley: It’s always important to have proper outlets for your curiousity.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): and breakers on your outlets
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top news story the robot plague is spreading, every day more and more ponies are turning into machines
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Uh Oh
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): But maybe we can turn of their breakers?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Okay you can turn on the breakers ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): As for the cause of the surge in robots people are point fingers at two scientists who are masters in their field Dr. Wiley and Dr. Robotnik.
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): Which people? What’s your source?
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): How many people? What percentage of the population?
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): FAKE NEWS
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Bnn news is just as fake as weekly world news ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): if not more
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): What percentage more fake? I wanna make sure I’m getting my fake money’s worth…
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): I need more fake bang for my fake buck.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Batty got the best news
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): well since it’s free.. I would say BNN new is worth about fifty Bison Bucks worth of fake news
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): The greatest news
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): it’s the best news in the world
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): (Assuming your world extends to the corners of your head)
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): My head has corners?
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): I thought I was feeling rather rectangular today…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for traffic, as you can see the apple shipment is due on Route 11 around 5 P.M. SL time. So you want to place pony riaders on the ridges here here and over here.
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley sounds the trumpet charge.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I said SL time!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): NO it’s too early to raid they aren’t even at the check points yet!
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): Damnit…
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): Ahhh now the carts are flipping out on the bridges and everything, the ponies are going nuts…
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): It’s pandemonium here guys…
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): Innocent people are getting trampled…
๖̶̶̶ζ͜͡Keith Rowley (Keith Rowley): Ponies are stomping once, about a hundred times…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports we sadly lost another Polo hooligan today after they were caught trying to flip a barn.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Flippin’ heck!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now we move onto todays weather it’s going to be another sunny day in SL…. Like it always is…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form out Sponsor Pat’s bait Towing. if your cart is in the drink and your pony ain’t rolling think Pat’s Towing
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And finally In stocks and Bonadge News, the Stocks are full again! So it’s a buyers market since there are so many ponies up for sale ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Uh Oh one of the warders found me broadcasting which means it’s punishment time . Tune in tomorrow when we find out If fifty lashes really enough? Til then stya batty eveyone!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Nighte everyone ^^^
2023-06-14 – Wrong Script
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story THE CITY OF TOWNSVILLE IS IN PERIL!!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Oh wait wrong script
Kim Nighthawk Rasputin (SamanthaSamira): NEWFLASH the fbi searching for a cheeky chittering cart and apple stealing bat this bat wears mostly glasses sometimes balancing a apple on her nose last she was seen stealing a cart and tools from the hoofesmith at frilly filly farm this major crime brings this bat on the fbi’s most wanted list if you see squeak toy alias batty bats report her to the nearest police station or fbi burea you can also use crimestoppers hompage for reporting purposes
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I haven’t bene wearing glasses much any more sicne I’m a robot now Kim ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Would join but with a freind right now ^^
2023-06-15 – Latex Party at WPG
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This Is BNN with break in News , the BNN news team has just hijacked a news cart and we are running down Route 345!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story; Party at WPG! Yes WPG is hosting a huge party and everyone is invited expect for stinky .. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Oh wait correction it’s not at WPG it’s at the cage club here is the link Addvertising for the Latex Room DJing
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Wait I pasted that wrong Shamara Yoshikawa aka
‘ Djane Ōkami 狼 ‘
brings you Tonight
🐺 Wolf powered Music 🐺
Hardcore Electro Spanks… ehrm Beats
When: 11am SLT – 1pm SLT
Where: The Cage Club, Latex Room / Slurl: http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Adult%20Hub%20BDSM/104/141/28
If you have, wear some nice Latex Outfit
We are Happy to see you there♥
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): There we go
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also there is a group of bat ponies stealign carts! I hope they catch them soon. I don’t want to lose the cart I just stole!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news The River City Ransom Hologians have broken out of prison!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and promise this weeks after Polo riot will be better then the last one. We wish them the best of luck
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor Pat’s Pony Polish, now with 50% Vitamin Q!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and Red 7 ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news today there is a road block on route 346 so I might have to take a detour trough the spoooky haunted woods, or I could go left.. we are taking it to a vote…. and spooky woods it is!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And finally in stocks and bondage news , the BBF hunting parties have once again turned up empty handed.. better luck next time fellas ^^
2023-06-27 – Alien Invasion
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with Breka in News! I’ve been caught!!
VukRiveraCroix: O……..O
Vukie (VukRiveraCroix): by who what where why?
Surssin: Carts should be safe.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I am currently in a doll display at RJH
Vukie (VukRiveraCroix): you are a cute doll ^^
Squeak Toy blushes
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story; The apple munchers from outer space have returned!!
Vukie (VukRiveraCroix): :O I love apples
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): The Pony military is doing their best to hold back the invasion, but they keep getting abducted and probed, with one Pony saying “It was a very pleasant experience and they gave me a sucker afterwards so all in in all I give this invasion five stars.”
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news the shipment of apples has not going out today due to the alien threat that looms over us all!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor Hank’s Tanks. if It’s not stuck in a river bank you didn’t buy it from hank. that’s hanks tanks now next to pony mart.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news the Hooligans are taking a week off after once again they were all arrested for starting a riot.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): When will they ever learn?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): You aren’t supposed to flip the squad cart till the day of the riot
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news if your sky is an eerie green and smells of rotten garbage, then your sim is currently under attack by aliens
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Life time ban from Polo Matches
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): YAY!!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): That means I don’t have to polo anymore ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is the best gift ever ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In politcal news those whacky royals are up to it again, this time the king tried to escape his stall and run for help. He did not get far and we have word that he was caught by TT and is now property of M73. Which means the queen needs a new stud. For details please contact your nearest SM or ST
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): All genders welcome ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Finally in stocks and bondage news the stock market is open! and they are letting you test them for free and with each stock bought they will throw in a member of pony nobility for free!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Can’t argue with a deal like that ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Well that is all from BBN today tune in tomorrow when we ask why did I forget to charge the laser in my finger.. pouts Till then stay Batty everyone!
2023-07-12 – Rabies
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We’re back, after a few weeks off due to rabies
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No, seriously the reason i have bene offline lately is I had to get rabie shots in RL
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story , We found out the world is not infact a vampire, but it may be a werewolf.
Surssin: meep! Sorry to hear that Batty
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yeah it has not been fun
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): but this was the last one ^^
Torakai: Oh dear god a werewolf?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): There wolf points to sur there polo feild!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news the Hooligans have borken out of prsion so that leaves the score gaurds 2 hooligans 37
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In taffic news there is a pile up out side of route 67 oddly enough that was also where today’s apple shipment was expected. so unless you are a raider please avoid thay route ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): now a word form our sponsors Kent’s tents. you tried the best now try the rest that’s kents tents. Now with 90% more mosquitoes.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): What about waterproofness?
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Do they leak?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): All the time!
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Cool
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Especially in the wet season
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In potical news, after being sold to BFF the royal stables are holding audtions for a new pony king and queen.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also claim your prize you have to pull the horse shoe from the mud
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news it’s a bright sunny day perfect for carting or, I don’t know, taking an empty cart to route 67 stocking up on apples.
Rose Moonsong (Torakai): that’s a good idea, apple robbery lol
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Just as the founding farmers wanted
Rose Moonsong (Torakai): lol
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Finally in stocks and bondage news the stocks are full which means that there is going to be a big sale this weekend. Buy three frillies get a stallion or a herm for free.
2023-09-21 – Apple Tree
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We got the news room confused for the storage shed.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): What time is the BON (Break Out News)?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Oh I already broke out of the cage I was in a hour ago ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story; TT is short one apple tree! That is right someone stole an entire apple tree from TT today
Blaze (Sushi Pawpad): remind me what TT stands for?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Tall tails
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Maybe its Tall Tales?
Barley Sugar stares at Batty
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): it wasn’t me this time honest! I was blindfolded and stealing a pony cart at the time
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sprots new the Hooligans are at it again this time they stole an entire pony event and moved it to celveland.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): One peice at a time and they had crew of ninety
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news a portal to heck has opened on route 4568
2023-12-05 – Chicken Suit and Tazers
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with Break in news! The studio is closed today due to SNOOOO. so we are coming to you live from a post at TT. I hijacked one of their telephone wires ^^
Dolly Waifu: Bad!
Amalthea Skydancer: Good Batty
boundtight: Well done!
Surssin face hooves. Starts tracking it
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I know right! but, don’t worry hazel, the stuido will be opened again after they remove that inch of snoooo on the walk way
Hazel baps the news-bat!
Squeak Toy eeps
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story; A fox has been caught in Old Man Mcgrergor’s hen house!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We don’t know how it got there nor how long it was wearing that chicken suit.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news the order of the wandering hooves have put away their rulers and now are brining out the Yaoi paddles to there next sportng event I tell you these nuns do not play by the rules.
Hazel (Dolly Waifu): Not the yaoi paddles D:
Barley Sugar grabs a dictionary and looks up Yaoi
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news today route 65 was closed after a cart crashed into a tree.. The tree is fine and will make a full recovery
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor Grant’s Discount Christmas ornaments. For when you want your family to ask WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT. Tell them it’s from Grant
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In politcal news today the bats that we hid in jolly’s stalls are currently under going training to pull the sleigh.. soon we will begin our evil plot to steal all the frut cake!
Surssin Zeimer adds ushers to lead them to the fruit cake. “Please do!”
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news as I had predicted it had finally snoooed in TT
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Which can onlly mean one thing!! I’m pyscho! ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Finally in stocks and bondage news the market has Finally been rebuilt and they have some new elves.. on sale… guys,… I told you once i told you a thousand times christmas elves.. not the elves that bake cookies in tress!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): OOps looks like hazel is getting the Tazer out and I don’t want to fry my systems which means it time for us to Skeeeee Daddle. Tune in tomorrow when we ask this random pony. Which tastes better Grass or this pine cone.The answer will suruprise you! Till then stay batty everyone ^^
Hazel hits the button to make it arc and crackle!
Surssin Zeimer (Surssin): I got her! Go get her ponies!
Squeak Toy finds a palce to hide and pretends to be a chriistmas orament
Surssin Zeimer inspects every tree
Cassaina: You can actually make a really tasty tea thats really good for you from pinecones
Squeak Toy chitters as Sur looks in the wrong place
Winnie Sweetwater: You have a tree in your cell
2023-12-12 – Teeth Marks
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news! I’m in the workshop ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): sadly not santa’s one… my arm fell off and I needed repairs
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story! SANTA IS A VAMPIRE!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We have phototage of him turning into a bat to get down the chimeny
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Also why else would he only travel at night!
maddiegodfrey2020: boo
Squeak Toy eeps
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news; The River city HooLigans are back!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): this time they have replaced all the polo balls with american foot balls
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news the apple shipment has made an unscheduled stop, on a different note does anyone want any fresh apples?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word from our sponsor
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Griff’s Potato chips! Now with 90% more air in the bag.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): So if you find a chip they weren’t from griff
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): That’s griff potato chips found in your local supermarket
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In politcal news.The king od the reigndeer is Missing!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): He was last seen strapped to the roof of a Buick
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for the weather. SNOOOO NOTHING BUT SNOOO
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Lastly in stock and bondage news Miss Jenkin’s selling her cow!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No punch line there just that she is selling her cow
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Anywho that is it from BNN News today tune in tomoorow when we find out just how much my repair bill is, the answer will surpirse you! till then stay batty everyone!!
Lilly Cottontail (Zawane): hmmm yea getting all those tooth marks out from me chewing on it… :D
Squeak Toy meeps
Lilly Cottontail (Zawane): teehee
2023-12-15 – King of the Reindeer
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor. Buster’s Thrusters. For when you want your horse to ace that course,
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In poltical news today The king of reindeer has been has been found! He is currently on display at Trophy Wife’s hunting lodge.
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Poor King of the Reindeers
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Oh he’s fine just a bit tied up at the moment
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s weather expect fog and snow here, here, here and that one spot over here that we keep forgetting to mention.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Sorry little spot
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Finally in stocks and Bondage news remember the buy a buck get three does deal is still going on Vinni’s venison
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): If you go order now they will throw in an elf with gender of your chosing for nine easy payments of 99,99
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): bargain!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I know right. OH I think we got the ship moving again! So tune in next time when we ask this strange tentacle monster if they want to get into acting. The answer will surpise you till then stay batty everyone!!
2023-12-16 – Coal
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news! We found santa!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story; WE HAVE COAL!!
Lilly Cottontail (Zawane): and Batty stole his sled :D
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yep all for his coal! I have enough here to power all the pony ranches for years to come ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news; a group of ponies have gone missing on route infinte, a rescue team has gone after them.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news; the river city hooligans have entered the sleigh races! However they were soon disqualified for “going all mad max up on their asses” Aww those poor mules…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Katinka! That is new news you have to wait for the old news to finish before p[osting the new news ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word from our sponsor Griff’s snake oil, you will belive it can do anything. ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And Tear Fall’s Christmas party! Link above, and also Santa is visiting FF at the moment and then later leaves.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In poltical news today a cart thief has stolen santa’s sleigh
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Twice
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): The bat was qouted as saying “more coal for the coal god!”
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s weather. There is snow and a 100% chance of falling sleighs ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Lastly in stocks and bondage news; There is christmas tack on sale on the market place!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Look how pretty this is https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/dM-deviousMInd-Merry-XXXmas-ALL-COLORS-Christmas-Lights-Harness/10581603 LOOK AT IT!!!
Lilly Cottontail (Zawane): You already have one. you don’t need another :P
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Lilly, it’s nto for me I wanted to show it to everyone ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Uh ho ho ho looks like santa found the net which means it’s time for me to make like a snoooo ball and get out of here! Tune in next time when we ask this random snoooman which way is the exit? The answer will surprise you, till then stay batty everyone!!
2023-12-23 – We Did It
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with Break in news!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): WE DID IT FOLKS!
Cassa turning the radio volume a bit up
2024
2024-01-12 – The Barn Exploded, but it’s Saved – Bat Magic
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No one is sure how the fire started, but all clues point thte the notrious fire bug, the pony known as flame thrower
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We are live at the scene
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and the barn just exploded!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Does anyone know how this fire started?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): But at least the cart rack is still standing
Agnieszka Kiyori: someone brought an old Prodigy CD?
Barley Sugar hums to herself # I am the fire starter, Twisted fire starter
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Good news the fire is out
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and barn has bene saved!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Goodwork ponies!!
Connie Frostbite: barn has been saved after it exploded?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yep ^^
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Bat Magic
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): Don’t question it
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and the carts are st5ill safe
Connie Frostbite: Sounds like an insurance scam to me.
Swenyia hopes the weed could be saved
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Ther weed is gone…
Swenyia sights
Maddie tickles squeak
2024-01-15 – Sonar’s Smoldering Wreckage
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN wityh late break in news!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We lost track of time cuddling anf forgot to sneak into the studio, but were’ here now!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And now for today’s top story It’s Camera man’s steve’s birthday! Get back to work steve
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news today we weren’t paying attention to the polo match yesterday so we have noi idea who won! but hey that dpoesn’t matter as along as all the ponies had fun
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news Route 510 is closed after the BNN news copter hit a bridge, we keep telling Sonar to watch where she is going
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word form our sponsor Slick nick’s chop shop. be it a stolen cart or a bot that needs to be torn apart. Do it quick and call Slick nick!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): That’s Slick Nick right off route 510 right next to sonar’s smoldering wreckage
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In poltical news today; The triners have decided that it’s international pet a pony day
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Take that as you will
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In weather news IT’S COLD! SO PUT ON A COAT AND SOME SOCKS!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And lastly in stocks and bondage news the stocks are still empty as the trainers have yet to catch me after I stole that cart yesterday
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And that is it for the News! tune in tomorrow when when we random strangers really puzzling questions to make fools of themselves. Till then Stay Batty Everyone ^^
2024-02-23 – Free Apple Day
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with break in news!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): We lost the lock pick again!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top news story.. It’s free apple day TT!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): So come on down to Tall Tails to get your apples a limit of fifty per vistor!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is no way a ploy to keep the traienrs busy so i can steal carts!
2024-05-17 – Wheel of Fortune
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No BNN is the new station ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): it’s the news you cna get banned for ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story someone stole all the apple seeds from Gree’s feed
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): There was a photo but it was too blurry to make out. So they have no idea it was me ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): in traffic news route nine is closed due to cleaning
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): but sadly we put the drier on the wrong setting so it’s a bit smaller then It used to be
Thork (WilliamWhitePaw): nom nom on the toy
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): *chitters because of the nibbles * In sports news the River City Holligans have decided to take their ball and go home.. Along with the stadium, ref, and the opposing team.
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): now a word form our sponsor Adam and Steve for wne you really want to be kinky ^^
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): i thing me have chance me spining wheel and look
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): [08:28] SG Wheel of Foretune: Release – Freedom
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): OH NO!!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Hidalgo is free quick someone get a lasso
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): [08:31] SG Wheel of Foretune: Release – Freedom
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): no im free look again
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I saw that is why we need to lasso you so you can be safe from poachers!
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): omg
Hidalgo Star (compulsif): [08:32] SG Wheel of Foretune: Silence – 3 month silence
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In farm news a new barn is being raised at crater ranch
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Don’t ask what happened to the old barn…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): or how itgot it’s name
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): in poltical news the king of ponies is single and ready to mingle with other stallions so sorry M… you can’t be pony queen…
Connie Frostbite: But can she be the Queen of Ponies?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): if she is running in the next pony election
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Then yes
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): OOps rl calls so I sadly can’t finish the news be back in a bit ^^
2024-06-12 – Super Glue
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): This is BNN with Break in news!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): The studio is under lock down due to too many break ins!
Faith (Pony Sorrowsong): you are breaking the news? or is the news already broken…
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Yes ^^
Faith (Pony Sorrowsong): why don’t you fix it?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Becsaue it’s fuin to break it more!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now for today’s top story due to recent incidents battys are banned from using super glue.
NovaFluff: gasp what happened with SUPER GLUE?!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I kinda glued mysehands together a few times while making minis…
Blaze (Sushi Pawpad): its scary when it happens
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): It happens a lot with me ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In traffic news route 37 is oepn to the public! and the public is not happy and gives the route a 3 out of 5
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In sports news The river city Hooligans are at it again! this time they abducted five refs and sold them to local pony ranches.
Tiffany (SubbieTiffany): “Agrees with banning the glue and nothing to do with glueing myself to the floor while building WH40k models as a kid….!”
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): I build age of siggmar minis myself ^^
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Now a word from our sponsor Helga’s ultra glue!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): what ever you glue will never come apart!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In farm news a new barn has been raised! Everyone welcome SL’s newest group Amish Pony Ranch
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): In politcal news the pony king has declared war on the trainers!
Barley Sugar (Kerry Kas): and is he looking for a queen?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): His royal majesty King sparkle dick the first
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): and sorry Barley he’s into other stallions
Barley Sugar pouts
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Don’t worry pony kings never riegn very long.. infact he has just been deposed
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): All hail the new pony king Skippy the 80th!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): And finally in weather news it’s still sunny…
Mariko Shiroikarasu (Veronique Aurelia): the new pony king eats the older pony king?
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): No silly the trianers sold the old ponyking
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): It happensevery news cycle
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): That is all for the news today tune in next time when we find out what happnes to all the formor pony royalty. The answer will surprise you!
Squeak Toy (Toren Epin): Till then stay batty everyone ^^
2024-07-12 – Snatching Success From The Jaws Of Defeat
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): This is BNN with break in news!
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): I broke into a cell at FFF ^^
galfox: Are you sure they did not open it to lock it bahind you
Barley Sugar (kerry.kas): OMG – Talk about snatching success from the jaws of defeat
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): XD
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): Barley caught me and locked me ^^
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): but I can still boardcast ^^
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): Now for today’s top story locks picks! a pony’s best freind
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): at least they would be if I didn’t leave the in the cart I stolke
galfox: to bad a bat is not a pony
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): batty is a pony I’m just a very battypony ^^
Barley Sugar (kerry.kas): So that’s a bratty batty pony
Barley Sugar (kerry.kas): The cage is for punishing naughty ponies
Barley Sugar (kerry.kas): or bats
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): perosnally I find them relaxing ^^
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): I guess that is why i don’t get arrested often
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): I lost count of how many carts I stole
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): I know one time I stole five in day
Azalea (evadarkheart): wow that could add up to a lot of prison time
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): Then there was the time I stole fifty carts from PFS
Squeak Toy (toren.epin): Then I lost count
2024-11-25 – Big Toe
Toren Epin: This BNN with Break In news!
Echo Local (toren.epin): The studio has been condemed, which means we can use it without problems other then the ceiling falling down
Chloe1982 Constantine: eh on the studio; how many carts have been stolen today?
Echo Local (toren.epin): None yet… yet..
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now fortoday’s top story It’s winter which means you trainers better be weather proffing your ponies
Echo Local (toren.epin): in sports news It’s pony hockey season!
Echo Local (toren.epin): And today the studs are taking on the cart pushers
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now for today’s traffic news we go to our eye in the sky, and… they crashed into a tree
Echo Local (toren.epin): I’m sure squeaky is fine
Surssin Zeimer (surssin): I told you not to hire George of the Jungle
Echo Local (toren.epin): She’s crashed into worse.
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now a word from our sponsor Degranged Jeff’s pony weather proofing
Echo Local (toren.epin): if your pony is under the weather used deranged Jeff’s all weather wrap.
Echo Local (toren.epin): They won’t be going anywhere but at least they will be staying warm.
DeeDeePapillon: And if it’s above the weather, time to clip your pony’s wings.
Echo Local (toren.epin) eeps!
Echo Local (toren.epin): in poltical news the king of ponies has been shot
Echo Local (toren.epin): Oh I miss read that, has been given a shot by the vet whom had to put them down after they broke their big toe
Echo Local (toren.epin): So all hail the new king of ponies lord sprinkle cheese
Echo Local (toren.epin): long may he neigh
Echo Local (toren.epin): and in weather news the dreaded Snooooo iis approaching or has already infested the ranches
Echo Local (toren.epin): Bringing with it covld and frozen water that pony science has no word for
Echo Local (toren.epin): Finally in stocks and bondage news Turkeys are in season so you should make a killing on the black market if you’re selling
Echo Local (toren.epin): and that is all from BNN news news tune in next time when we ask this random trainer to look where we are poininting. Will they look? The answer will suprise you till then stay batty everyone
Surssin Zeimer feeds Batty stolen apples
Echo Local happily nibbles
2024-12-02 – Stolen Fruit Cake
Echo Local: This is BNN with break in news!
Echo Local: we are currently lost trying to break into santa’s workshop
Roxanne: trying to become santa’s reindeer-pony’s?
livestock wonders if batty is going to try to steal apples from Santa.
Echo Local: Nope we’re going to sneak into santa’s bag of toys so we can then sneak out and steall all the fuirt cake
livestock: Why do you need to steal the toys, why not go directly to the fruit cake and steal just that?
Echo Local: We aren’t stealing the toys silly
Echo Local: we’re hiding in the bag with the toys
Peregreen: today in the Kama City Herald:
Santa Sets Up Decoy Workshop to Fool Burglars and Protect Christmas Magic!
Kama City, North Pole – In an unexpected twist of holiday cheer, Santa Claus has taken proactive measures to secure his workshop against potential holiday heists. This year, the jolly old man in red has set up a decoy workshop to fool any would-be burglars eager to steal the magic of Christmas.
With reports of increased break-ins in nearby towns, Santa decided to take matters into his own hands. “We can’t let anyone ruin the spirit of Christmas,” said Santa, chuckling as he adjusted his iconic red hat. “While the elves are busy crafting toys and preparing for the big night, we thought it wise to throw a little misdirection into the mix.”
The decoy workshop, equipped with faux elves, imitation toys, and even a few cleverly placed cameras, is situated just a few yards from Santa’s real workshop. The elaborate setup includes a sign reading, “Santa’s Toy Factory – Now Hiring!” to attract curious onlookers and potential thieves alike.
Local law enforcement has praised Santa’s creative approach to security. Officer Merry McJingle stated, “We’ve seen an uptick in holiday thefts lately, and Santa’s decoy workshop is a fantastic idea. It not only protects his valuable toys but also adds a layer of fun to the festivities. We encourage everyone to embrace the spirit of Christmas and keep an eye out for suspicious activity!”
Echo Local: You can protect the toys we’re after the left over fruit cake
Cotton Candy: I hear that Santa’s reindeer escapped. I believe one is pink white and light blue.
Echo Local: I thought the escaped deer was a big blue wolf
2024-12-05 – Left Over Fruit Cake
Echo Local (toren epin): This Is BNN with break in News! we’re pretending to be deer at santa’s stables
Echo Local (toren.epin): and they are giving us odd looks
Renztoy: Um Santa is looking for me… I dont want to pull his sleigh this year…
Echo Local (toren.epin): I’ll pull, it gets me closer to my plan to steal the world’s left over fruit cake
2024-12-23 – Elves in Disguise
Echo Local (toren.epin): This is BNN with break in News ^^
Echo Local (toren.epin): Trainers are elves in disguise!
Echo Local (toren.epin): I know because one trainer I saw had pointy ears
Echo Local (toren.epin): so far the grandpas are winning with a boring story abotu how when they were their age…..ZZZZZZZ
Echo Local (toren.epin): TRAFFIC!
Echo Local (toren.epin): Route 13 is having back to back traffic today
Blaze037: I wonder why?
Echo Local (toren.epin): Holiday shopping and not becasue I parked 50 carts in one spot…
Echo Local (toren.epin): On to a word from our sponsor Saint Nick’s deer Jerky. WE bet you are Blitzen for some!
Roxanne: now we know were all the stolen carts went…
Echo Local (toren.epin): Oh no the carts I steal go to Gemma’s cart shop ^^
Echo Local (toren.epin): In politcal news The king of ponies has been dethroned after it turned out he was really a deer
Echo Local (toren.epin): in weather news it’s snoooing so make sure you put your ponies in proper winter attire and get them reshoed, or else the christmas vet with her shot gun will come.
Echo Local (toren.epin): Finally in stocks and bondage news The stocks are stil empty becasue you haven’t caught me yet!
Echo Local (toren.epin): Well that is all for BNN today, tune in tomorrow when we see what happens if you put a bag of holding inside santa’s bag of holding. The answer wiill surprise you ^^
Echo Local (toren.epin): Till then stay batty everyone!!
2025
2025-01-08 – On The Throne
Toren Epin: This is BNN wityh break in news
Echo Local (toren.epin): WE GOT THE FRUIT CAKE!
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now for today’s top story Sleighs are they carts
Echo Local (toren.epin): we asked our top pony scientists this question and it started a brawl… so while they try to figure out the answer.. Lets go to sports. ^^
Echo Local (toren.epin): In sports news the Flordians take on the Midwesterner in pony polo at iceburg stadium ^^
Echo Local (toren.epin): In traffic news there is an ice patch on route 275 by that I mena all of route 275 is ice
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now a word form our sponsor crazy jake’s Bar and grill. You hit em we cook em.
Echo Local (toren.epin): in political news the current pony king is still on the throne. It must have been something he ate.
Echo Local (toren.epin): In weather news the snoooooooo invasion has yet to stop with snooo still infesting FFF and TT
Echo Local (toren.epin): leaving this reporter to ask does anyone have a scarf?
Echo Local (toren.epin): finally in stocks and bondage news I’mm still running wild, try to catch me if you dare!
Echo Local (toren.epin): And that is all for BNN today tune in tomorrow when we find out if this shinny thing is a trap. Till then Stay batty everyone!
DeeDeePapillon: lol batty Echo! Great broadcast as always. :)
Echo Local (toren.epin): Thanks ^^
2025-01-20 – Viva La Hoof
Echo Local: fires a cannon
Echo Local: This is BNN with break in news!
Echo Local: We found the armory!
Echo Local: The Pony relvoution begins!
Echo Local: VIVA LA HOOF!
Maxie: What’s a viva?
Echo Local: No idea
Maxie: Oooh! Is that the new spanking implement from Nintendo? A switch 2?
Echo Local: gives maxie a bazooka
Echo Local: It might be this thing ^^
Maxie: Batty… while I do love you, I don’t appreciate you calling my boobs that name…
2025-01-21 – Nooo Shoes
Echo Local: This is BNN with break in news
Echo Local: The pony revolutionary army has taken the the barn steel and are now looking for black smiths to make new shoes
damecoquine: viva la revolution
2025-01-29 – Missing Carts
Echo Local (toren.epin): This is BNN with break in news
Maderella A Godfrey-Hope tickles batty
Echo Local eeps and squeals
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now for today’s top storey carts are going missing alll over SL!
Echo Local (toren.epin): Has the batty theif returned to her wicked ways?
Echo Local (toren.epin): Our top pony reseachers don’t seem to care
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now for sports; The Cursaders take on the Pony raiders today for the title of the most catchy leauge name. the loser will have to change their teams name to the less forcefull sounding silly billies
Echo Local (toren.epin): in traffic news route 911 is closed due to another accident
Echo Local (toren.epin): after a forty cart pile up
Echo Local (toren.epin): No ponies were hurt
Echo Local (toren.epin): But a trainer sprained their ankle and the vet had to put them down
Echo Local (toren.epin): Oh wait that was unrelaterd to the crash
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now a word four our sponosr Mrs Frumpkins’ tastey cakes
Echo Local (toren.epin): Now with more dye 167
Echo Local (toren.epin): In poltical news; the new law passed today Now every ranch will have more cuddle spots
Echo Local (toren.epin): The law passed with 200 whinnies to 100 neighs
2025-02-03 – Battering Ram
Toren Epin: This is BNN with break in news!
Echo Local: We need a new battering ram… our broke
Echo Local: Now for today’s top story The SNOOO is going away!
Echo Local: I was at FFF and the snoooo vanished as if it was never there….
Echo Local: But the snooooo is still at TT
Echo Local: Maybe it migrated?
Echo Local: To find out if snooo migrates we contacted the smarest pony we know… sadly she was sold to a glue factory so we asked the bottle some questions
Echo Local: We got no respoponse
Echo Local: Oh welll, back to the news
Echo Local: in sports news; the river city holligans won the trophy at yesterdays polo match after they head coach took it a yelled ” mine” everyone knows by pony law that does make the item thiers
Echo Local: Under case of finders keeper losers weepers
Surssin: hmmm, I thought the trainer supreme court overturned that. Something about ponies not being able to own anything not given to them.
Echo Local: The rule doesn’t apply to ponies but if a coach does it
Echo Local: or a trainer